This is the Day the Lord Has Made?
Helping Kids Navigate Disappointment | by Caroline Saunders
Our days often don’t unfold the way we expect. It’s a lesson that pushes grownups to our limits, so of course it’s difficult for kids to navigate the disappointments that come when our expectations aren’t met. How can we help them (and ourselves) accept the day they (we) have been given rather than the day they (we) imagined?
Recently, I had to miss the women’s retreat I spent all year preparing. It’s a dramatic story for another time, but for today, let’s sum it up like this: I got sick, and the weekend unfolded differently than I’d expected. As my symptoms let up enough to make space for anything else, feelings of disappointment and sadness settled in.
A few weeks later, my daughter became unexpectedly ill, and we had to cut a family vacation short. She was distraught. Yes, the sickness was sad, but sickness on vacation? A time we’d counted on for fun? It felt like too much to bear. Fortunately, on the way home, my husband bought her a sweatshirt from a souvenir shop, and we learned something important about our daughter: sweatshirts make everything better.
Of course, sometimes we need something more substantial than a hoodie.
This Is the Day the Lord Has Made
The refrain that echoes in my mind in such situations is a simple one from Psalm 118: “This is the day the Lord has made. Let’s rejoice and be glad in it” (v. 24). It helps me to meditate on the word “this.” This is the day—not some other day. What does it mean that God gave me this day—and not the one I expected?
When I shared this with my daughter in her disappointment, I noticed a bit of relief in her posture. After all, she wasn’t ruining the vacation—she really doesn’t have that much power. Instead, we as a family were receiving what God had given, and we would try to do it gladly, knowing that somehow, this was a day worth rejoicing in. We know rejoicing isn’t dependent upon our fun plans but upon our good God and what He decides to give us. So, we would keep our eyes peeled for what is wonderful, and we would trust God’s hands even if we couldn’t make sense of what He’s doing.
When we—or our kids—feel disappointed that things didn’t go according to our plans, we have the relief of remembering that we’re simply not that powerful. This is the day, and God made it.
Let’s Rejoice and Be Glad in It
But what does it look like to rejoice and be glad in this day? I don’t think it’s a matter of positive thinking. Optimism is never our savior. We must look to something deeper.
In Psalm 139, David speaks of God’s limitlessness, acknowledges how God has limited him—and then responds with awe. He says, “Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high; I cannot attain it.” David didn’t understand what God was doing, but as he noticed his smallness and God's bigness, David trusted this design was good.
Similarly, Job endured suffering that didn’t make sense to him, and yet, when God finally spoke, it wasn’t to explain but to remind Job of God’s greatness. In response, Job worships, saying, “I have uttered what I did not understand, things too wonderful for me, which I did not know.” (Job 42:3). This, too, is an act of faith.
“Wonderful” is not often a word that comes to mind when we’re limited, perhaps because we’re focused on our limitations rather than the limitless God. But when our limitless God limits us, we can trust Him, by faith. In fact, James tells us we can place our “trials of various kinds” into an unexpected category: “joy.” Why? Because God uses our trials to grow us to be more like Him. (See James 1:2-4.) Because God works all things together for good for those who love Him. (See Romans 8:28.)
What do you do on a day that is not going at all the way you thought it would? By faith, we see our smallness and His bigness and consider it a call to worship. By faith, we can say surely He is good and can be trusted, even in (perhaps especially in) this day. By faith, we can trust God is up to something wonderful.
Caroline Saunders is a writer, Bible teacher, pastor's wife, and mother of three who believes in taking Jesus seriously and being un-serious about nearly everything else. Her latest projects include her first women's Bible study called Come Home: Tracing God's Promise of Home in Scripture and a storybook Bible, Kids in the Bible Storybook. She's written two books for Kaleidoscope: Sound the Alarm: Joel, Amos, and Jonah and Remarkable: The Gospel of Mark. In every project, she seeks to use wit and wisdom to help others know and love God and His Word. Find her writing, resources, and ridiculousness at WriterCaroline.com and on Instagram @writercaroline.